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When Fear Becomes the Default

In this special episode, When Fear Becomes the Default.

Early Sunday morning, I was cycling past a small veterans’ pocket park in San Marcos. The air was still, the streets nearly empty. On one corner stood a young woman, alone, holding a hand-painted sign that read: “Be ANGRY. ICE agents are murdering people.”

I pedaled past, but the words stayed with me. I knew the context—the footage and headlines from Minneapolis the day before, already ricocheting through the country and hardening opinions. Even in the quiet of the ride, the noise followed.

Two miles later, I stopped at a red light. A black car with dark windows pulled up inches from my bike. My heart jumped. My first instinct wasn’t neighbor—it was threat. I found myself bracing, scanning, and wondering if the person inside was angry, armed, or looking for trouble.

Then the door opened.

A well-dressed young woman stepped out, walked to the trunk, and pulled out a sign that read “Open House.” She turned, smiled brightly, and said, “How are you this morning?”

I smiled back, feeling an unexpected rush of relief—and a twinge of embarrassment. “I’m just fine,” I said. “And you?”

The Numbness We Carry

That moment stayed with me longer than the ride itself. Why had I been so quick to assume the worst?

The answer came later while watching Jimmy Kimmel Live. His voice cracked as he spoke about the shooting in Minneapolis, about being told by those in power that “we aren’t seeing what we clearly see.” He spoke of a baseline of decency—a time when human life was mourned first, before it was sorted into political bins.

When violence becomes a constant background noise, we adapt. We build a shell to get through the day. Numbness feels like protection, but it quietly rewires us. We begin to see danger at every intersection, suspicion in every stranger, because it feels like the moral floor has dropped out from under us.

I wasn’t afraid because of that woman in the park or the driver in the car. I was afraid because I’ve been conditioned by the media to expect the worst.

Reclaiming Our Humanity

The hopeful moments weren’t in any headline. They were small and easy to miss. They were in the young woman standing alone in the park, refusing to be indifferent to a life lost 1,500 miles away. And they were in the real estate agent who reminded me—with nothing more than a smile and a greeting—that most people are still just living their lives and wishing each other well.

Kimmel said that speaking up is how we defend our decency. He’s right. But that intersection reminded me of something quieter and just as important: speaking up also means checking our own hearts. It means resisting the reflex to let fear decide who we think people are.

Once we stop feeling the weight of a life lost, we lose the very freedom we think we are protecting.

We are all carrying a lot right now. When was the last time a simple, ordinary interaction reminded you that we are more than the headlines we read?

I’m Patrick Ball. Stay observant. This is one of those moments when paying attention—and speaking up—still matters.

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Comments

Don Hanley said…
An excellent reminder Patrick of how we are easily conditioned to be fearful so easily.
January 27, 2026 at 11:42 AM
Anonymous said…
Patrick, this is Ed Coonce, I'm on BlueSky and Threads/Instagram as @coonceed
Thank your for this reminder. I, also, am apprehensive and watchful. The times, they are a changing. We, the people will prevail.
January 27, 2026 at 2:45 PM
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